At our men’s group recently, we were discussing farming and fields.
“How does agriculture discussion happen in LA?” you might ask. One of our guys brought up this chapter in the Bible, Matthew 13, which is about a farmer planting seeds in a field. It wasn’t long before we were talking about how a field can represent us as men (incidentally, I apparently ponder this often).
Someone brought up how farmlands and even athletic fields need rest to build up root reserves. Interesting. I asked, “Isn’t it strange that something as simple as dirt needs rest?” In fact, soil also needs water and nutrition; it has to be tended to for it to produce a crop.
I can relate to this need for rest. I’m busy, and I can feel my lack of root reserves frequently. Everything becomes shallow in highly stressful moments, and even though it seems I’m working hard on the surface, I’m actually getting nowhere.
Now that I’m married, I’ve noticed my stress not only affects me, but my wife, Kristen, as well.
Back to men and fields. One guy replied, “Doesn’t the Bible say we are made from dirt?” My good friend Sebastian said, “The word ‘husbandry’ means to take care of the field.”
“Husbandry isn’t marriage,” replied Sebastian. “It’s tending crops and animals.”
A husband, in this sense, is one who takes care of many things.
Just like soil, we have to be tended to and cared for early in life to be healthy. However, not many of us have that advantage. Fields get wrecked.
Have you felt your life was wrecked?
The good news is, a wrecked field can find renewed purpose. In fact, sometimes land is destroyed on purpose for a purpose. Farmers and foresters use field burning to prepare land for planting. Weeds and their seeds are killed off by the fire. The land starts again on a clean slate. Fire purifies the land, and then the field rests again for a time.
As men, it’s ok to acknowledge our need for rest. We must be husbandry over our lives. We might think a girl can bring rest and fulfillment to us. However, that line of thinking means we depend on another person for security.
Do You Want To Be A Husband? Start With Husbandry.
It’s only after we learn to take care of ourselves, we can advance from husbandry to husband.
I wasn’t able to find a direct correlation between husband and husbandry. In fact, when husband was traced back to the 13th century, it didn’t mean “married man.” Interestingly, wife came from the word wif, and the “man of a married couple” was called a wer.
Today we only use wer in one context…werewolf, meaning “man-wolf.” I’m currently thinking Wer would be a great name for my future son.
Now, let’s recover from my ADHD.
Initially, husband simply meant “head of the house.” Today, I might get accused of being paternalistic by saying men should be the heads of the household. And it’s kinda sad. After all, paternalistic should be a great word to use, not a negative one, because it means how a father treats his children. I hope my future children think of that term with a sense of fondness because I treated them with love.
As husbands, we’re no longer just caretakers of our fields, but we sow into our wives and children’s lives as well.I’m very excited to announce my book, 10 Ways To Win A Girl’s Heart is available for order.