You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” –Jim Rohn
There are a lot of components when it comes to self-improvement, but if you’re not happy with who you are, look at your closest friends. Change requires going outside of your comfort zone and sometimes finding new friends.
In an Art of Charm podcast episode, Kris Wolfe, the founder/editor of goodguyswag.com discusses the premise of the site.
The Good Guy Swag Approach: a man is complete through the mind, body, and soul:
1. The Mind
Of course you can do daily affirmations in the mirror, but being strong in the mind really means clearing out any obstacles that might be keeping you from your goals. For some, it might mean counseling; for others, it might be finding good mentors or a group of good men. Find whatever tactic works for you. A lot of guys believe the woman of their dreams will solve all of their problems, but that’s a lie. Start with yourself. If you are struggling with addictions or issues, put down your pride, and seek help.
2. The Body
After your mindset has changed, work on your confidence. Since the good guy swag model is a holistic approach, developing a body you can be proud of will help develop confidence.
Having a healthy body is about more than just having confidence. Your physical well-being has effects on your mind and your soul (for some, your moral compass). You can’t be at the top of your game if your body is slowing you down. It doesn’t matter if you have a physical handicap, there are numerous examples of inspiration you can look to. Nick Vujicic was born with no limbs, but that didn’t deter him from his dreams.
3. The Soul
Along with developing confidence in your physical body, work on your spiritual body too. Have you spent time in prayer or meditation? When was the last time you’ve given yourself 5 minutes of free time with no distraction? It’s as simple as putting your phone away, turning off the radio, and taking a moment to listen.
Once again, your spiritual body will be influenced by the people around you. Do you have a group of friends around you who encourage your soul? What about your girlfriend? Sharing the same faith as your future wife is important.
Bottom line is: if you want to date, be in a relationship, or get married, prepare yourself to be the best person you can be. Don’t believe that marrying or dating the right person will solve your problems. In fact, relationships tend to amplify your problems.
Put yourself in an environment of friends who will make you stronger mentally, physically, and spiritually.
If you’d like to listen to the Art of Charm episode I was privileged to be a part of, you can do so here: