As you grow with a group of friends, time changes things, but you can end up feeling exactly the same. You watch your buddies pair off, get married and start families. As much as people want to say that things will be the same, in reality, your friend group has forever changed. Today we are going to discuss how to change your perspective and stay close to friends with children.
Much of single, adult life is about hanging with friends. The right group can help you become a better person. Together, as iron sharpens iron, you have become better people, fought the good fight, did stupid things, and made memories.
All was well until…one brother gets married. The phase you thought was temporary fascination for a woman was genuine, and they became happily wed. You adjust to the new person in the group, and their new place in the life of your buddy.
But as time goes on, they have a child–a cute wonderful tyrant who decrees your friend is now a prisoner.
It’s far too easy to get frustrated that your friends are no longer “fun.” Instead you need to learn how to accept their new priorities, and navigate the new arena they live in.
Here are a few ways on…
How to Change Your Perspective and Stay Close to Your Friends with Children
Go to them
As I already mentioned, your friends are now prisoners in some sense. Their lives and activities are somewhat dictated by the child. Therefore they are less likely to leave the house for a night on the town. You can overcome this by going to them. Likely they will be happy to know that you still care and will be excited to have some adult company.
Offer to bring some food over when you visit, making your presence less of a burden on the family and giving you the chance to do something nice for them.
It’s incredible how new parents learn that their little child is the cutest and best at everything. Instead of the conversation you have may been used to before, you may find your friend obsessively sharing anecdotes of his new child. Very likely you’ll find it cute at first…later boring. Have grace and recognize it for the parental pride that it is.
Share in the Joy
Depending on the closeness of the relationship, you very likely find yourself as “Uncle Ted.” Rather than scoff at it, accept it as the honor it is and take the role you have in the new family seriously.
The most straightforward recommendation on this list. Life has changed and learn to roll with it. Your old friends won’t always go out on the town with you, but that doesn’t mean you have to stop going out yourself.
Friendship is a rare and important thing, and shouldn’t be abandoned due to changing circumstances. Friendship based on convenience and ease is not true friendship. Cliche as it sounds, your friends starting a family isn’t the end, it is a new beginning…with new battles, new stupid choices, and new memories to make.