Your girlfriend’s mother is likely to be one of the most important people in her life, so making a good impression on your new girlfriend’s mother is key to how the relationship plays out. By meeting her mother you are taking the relationship from a casual status, to an altogether more solid one. If you like her and see this romance lasting the distance then it is time to impress your girlfriend’s mother. Dust down your best shirt, head out to buy flowers and get your best (subtle) flirting face on.
Remember that however old your new girlfriend is and whatever has gone on in her relationship history, she is still her parents’ perfect little girl and getting her mother’s vote is one step closer to winning over her dad – an altogether more arduous process. With this in mind and with Mother’s Day just around the corner (March 15 in the UK, May 15 in the US), here at Lovestruck.com, we bestow these 9 tips on how to impress your girlfriend’s mother:
1. Dress to impress: Nothing says more about you than your clothes, so ditch the trainers and sweatshirt and opt for something altogether sharper and put together. Even if it is a relaxed meal out of at their house, shower and shave and put on a shirt, chinos and a smart blazer. Do not be afraid of using the iron – or shoe polish for that matter.
2. Perfect your body language: Make eye contact, smile and shake her warmly by the hand. First impressions are everything. Address her as Mrs XX until she asks you to use her first name. Try to keep an open and neutral body language, so don’t cross your arms or fidget, even if nerves are getting the better of you.
3. Bring a gift: If you’re going to her mom or her parents’ house, flowers make a great gift. Aim for something more expensive than the budget supermarket option and remember to remove the price tag.
4. Do you research: Before you go, ask your girlfriend all about her mom and her likes and dislikes. With this knowledge you’ll be well and truly armed to ask the right questions should an awkward silence arise.
5. Ask questions: People love talking about themselves, so when in doubt ask her questions about her interests, hobbies or work. Whatever you do, stay focused and look interested and avoid controversial topics like politics. Think creatively and ask questions about things she has said to show you are listening.
6. Give compliments: Pay everyone, especially your girlfriend’s mum, compliments about her home, her cooking and her daughter. Naturally you shouldn’t overdo it and be insincere but a little bit of charm goes a long way. Always offer to help by setting or clearing the table or washing up if you are in her home.
7. Keep PDA bay: Treat your girlfriend kindly but even if you’re entrenched in the honeymoon phase and can’t keep your hands of each other, avoid PDA at all costs. If you are staying over, be prepared to stay in separate rooms and follow the house rules. No one likes to stumble across an excessive PDA around the table or even worse, after lights out – least of all your girlfriend’s mom.
8. Play to your strengths: Your girlfriend’s mom will be curious about your career, your goals and education. Play to your strengths and treat the encounter as you would a job interview – talk up your achievements but don’t overdo it, or embellish the truth.
9. Write a note: Everyone’s mother loves a hand-written note, so if you went to her home or stayed at her house, write a short note saying thank you and how you enjoyed meeting her.
Any more tips for meeting a prospective mother-in-law? Tell us your thoughts @lovestruck on Twitter.